Hi all how are you, so Im writing to you today about some thoughts i've had and some views i've got and about yesterdays conference I attended in Chester which explored the role of religion and spirituality within addiction and recovery.
One thing that will become apparent in todays post is that after alot of research and absorbing I am starting to find my own opinions and my own voice. I will be using this to write my own book on addiction and recovery, partly this blog converted and then adding more to it. I then aim to get the book published and become a public speaker on the UK recovery scene at conferences etc. This is the dream and one has to have a dream, to have a dream come true after all!
Ok so I went in to the conference somewhat agnostic given my atheist views in life. Im was not ignorant to the fact though that for many people many religion and spirituality invariably plays a massive part in recovery from addiction. One can seldom overcome an addiction without some kind of faith, be it in a higher power or ones own abilities. Me personally, I have now achieved 9 months sober as an atheist and it has been enough of a success for me. I will write future posts this week exploring individual religions and there relationship to addiction and recovery more.
The photo above is of my a a pleasant chap called Tim Roberts. Tim introduced himself to me as a fond reader of this very blog and offered some very kind feedback upon its progress, thank you Tim it was lovely to of met you.
I enjoyed the conference and the speakers despite of my own beliefs and learnt quite a few concepts and thoughts which can be universally applied to recovery in spite of religion.
I want now to talk about 2 points in particular which have lingered in my mind.
Ok so one thing someone said was something along the lines of 'The addict suffers', what??!! So all the times I was drunk and having way too much fun or escaping my reality was I suffering, really??!! Is the person who is surfing a drug induced high really suffering? Me personally the only suffering that would be involved was the next day and to relationships and situations around me but in essence all that suffering was self induced through my own choice to drink. No one forced me to drink, I knew the consequences of my actions going in to it. I beg to differ that the addict suffers, that would suggest that its an uncontrolled, unwanted pain inflicted upon you, that is not the case, ultimately we are the ones that make the choice to use and if one is to live by the sword one must die by the sword.
This resonates with a concept that i've had for a while now, which is that as an addict ultimately we must take ownership of the problem we have and the life we have lived. By this I mean, and its something i was guilty of, it is easy to blame other factors for you addiction i.e "I had a crap childhood" "My missus left me" or "I lost my job", although all of these are crappy things did anyone but yourself then force you to drink or take drugs?. Yes these factors are certainly contributing factors which help you make the decision to use but ultimately the buck has to stop with oneself because only you choose to drink or use, no one else! Until we take 100% ownership of the problem we can never properly address the problem which is within us and recover from the problem.
Another thing which I took away from yesterday is this concept of recovery being a competition. This works on two different levels namely service user wise and services wise.
Lets look first at the service user level. Its this concept that some service users are sometimes judged as 'not proper addicts' or not 'having a real problem'. This is judgement made through comparison and its not right to do. We are all in recovery for whatever ever reason and being in recovery and on the journey to recovery is a universal road regardless of age, race, sex, religious views, political views, wealth and more importantly your pre-recovery background. By this I mean if we are in recovery the levels of our previous use and what we were using is IRRELEVANT!! what is important is that we have all identified that we need some help and we all that have in common and should use that to move forward and support each other on the road to recovery.
Ok so the other aspect of the competition thought is services and fellowships etc. Recovery for me is like a Tapas menu. Let me explain this, ok so lets say for one of the fellowships like AA is a bowl of Olives, I may come along try the olives and hate the taste of them, they don't agree with my digestive system and i reject eating anymore. Joe Bloggs may then come along and try the same olives and love them and shout from the rooftops that they are the best thing ever. Me and Joe might then move onto another dish, I love the new dish can't get enough of it and swear blind by it, Joe however doesn't like it and it goes straight through him. Recovery is the same, no one company, service or individual holds or owns the right to 'the correct, definitive' answer or cure to addiction. There is no universal one fits all answer what works for some might not work for others.
The only answer of the question, what is the best recovery treatment/route or the cure whatever you want to call it is : What ever keeps you clean and sober and helps you on your journey is the correct answer no matter how ever far fetched others may deem it to be, this is your journey and your road and what ever guides you up it is best for you.
So one last thing I want to talk about is Burger King & Greggs fast food restaurants given the following two articles.
Let me first clarify I am not anti-alcohol, Im not preaching and saying just because I couldn't handle 'Don't Drink', in fact quite the opposite. I fully understand that people drink and can enjoy a few in moderation and go about there lives successfully and fair play to them, im jealous of them the swines! lol. This blog is to express my opinion which as a free thinking human I have a right to do.
So Burger King want to start serving booze in there UK restaurants, why? for what benefit? I just don't see the demand and need for this. Is there individuals going into Burger King sometimes if not often for a family meal thinking "All im missing here is a nice cold beer?" and furthermore with what I can only presume from my own experience is a young customer base is this not causing more work for themselves in terms of making sure only individuals over the age of 18 are being served alcohol. I presume as well that this new line of service would need to be advertised and how often is fast food restaurants advertise towards families and young children?
Burger King have said it is a case of catching up with its other restaurants world wide which to an extent is a fair point. I would however suggest that yes there is demand for it in other countries etc and thats fine, but this country already has a massive binge drinking culture, do we really need to be adding more fuel to that fire?
McDonalds have been questioned about Burger Kings approach and have said they have no demand for it and it "was not something that fits with the family-friendly focus of our restaurants in the UK".
I can't help but wonder that if Burger King get the licensing right to do this in the 4 restaurants they want to and they gain success from it and role it out nation wide wether other companies like McDonalds and KFC will naturally want to compete. How long will it be until you can go to a pizza shop at the end of a night out and buy more beer or have a pint whilst waiting for your kebab, burger or pizza?? is this were this is heading no limits on time or locations you can buy alcohol.
Now today I read Greggs want to hold a wine tasting session. They want to show customers which grapes to pair with there products. I do not understand why they can't do this with the actual grapes, why make a wine tasting alcohol involved event of it, I just don't understand.
Any way that enough for now, I will write more soon, take care x
